Annie's Woodshed: And so the journey begins...

A True Wife

"A true wife makes a man's life nobler, stronger, grander, by the omnipotence of her love 'turning all the forces of manhood upward and heavenward.' While she clings to him in holy confidence and loving dependence she brings out in him whatever is nobles and richest in his being. She inspires him with her courage and earnestness. She beautifies his life. She softens whatever is rude and harsh in his habits or his spirit. She clothes him with the gentler graces of refined and cultured manhood. While she yields to him and never disregards his lightest wish, she is really his queen, ruling his whole life and leading him onward and upward in every proper path. -JR Miller

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

And so the journey begins...

This is a journal of my journey to becoming a submissive wife. Hubby and I have been married since I was 18, I am now 47, but I have always fought for control. Here lately though something seemed to be missing in my marriage. I had started reading romance novels and was drawn to the ones with the strong dominate male. The more I thought about it the more I realized that is what I wanted in real life… a strong dominate male to rule the roost.

Well since I already had a husband and I really liked him and wanted to keep him. I mean I had over 29 years and three children invested in this man. Why would I want to start over? Plus he is the love of my life, my soul mate, so I started reading more on domestic discipline, the more I read the more I was intrigued. After I picked my way through the wackos out there I realized I was not the only wife that longed for her husband to take her in hand and say enough. Many were already living this life style and were at peace.

Peace…that sounded lovely. Peace and security was what I wanted most. I realized that I was insecure in our marriage. Don’t get me wrong Hubby tells me that he loves me. There is not a day that goes by that I am not hugged and told I am loved. But I want more I want to know that he is going to protect me that he is going to stand between me and the big bad world. I want to know that he has my best interest at heart and he is going to see that I do not do anything stupid to harm myself… i.e. like not getting my weight under control. No taking time for myself and getting those yearly physicals. You know the things we women hate to do and will put off.

Another thing that prompted this change in our relationship is I was resenting Hubby for not being the head of house (HOH) then I realized I was not allowing him to be HOH. So I am letting go and letting him…which is harder than I thought. I have been in control for so long.

I have a feeling this journey is going to be a bumpy ride and uncomfortable especially when I start getting my backside tanned.

Before closing I would like to say this is not your typical Domestic Disciple blog. I am not in to kinky stuff. No S&M No Bondage this is about as vanilla as you are going to get folks so if you want the kinky stuff keep looking. If you want to hear about a Christian wife’s struggle to be a submissive helpmeet and allow her husband to be the HOH then come back and share the journey with me.

Have a wonderful and blessed day.

5 comments:

SerenityNovember 19, 2010 at 10:06 PM
Annie,

Welcome to the blogging world! I wish you much luck on your journey.

serenity
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AnonymousNovember 22, 2010 at 4:29 PM
Annie,

Your blog is beautiful and I wish you the best. Your story is sounds so much like mine!!!!! I am 49 and been married 27 years, 7 kids (6 still living at home) and I wanted JJ to take control. I had tried it for 27 years, and it didn't work. It took a while for JJ to truly grasp that I relinquished control, so it is going to take some time for your HOH to see that you are really surrendering the control.

If there is anything I can help with, feel free to contact me. butterflykady@rocketmail.com. BTW, we are state neighbors..... :) I will tell you privately where we are if you email me..... we might be closer than you think!

Kady

Kady
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Annie's WoodshedNovember 23, 2010 at 8:28 AM
Thanks Kady, I am glad to know there is hope. I think once he sees that I am really serious about this and I don't ask if this task has been done if this bill has been paid then he will realize that hey she is serious she is letting me be HOH. I know this is not going to happen over night. I mean we have 29 years of control to break. The next 29 should be interesting LOL.
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AnonymousAugust 9, 2012 at 10:42 PM
I do not know if you will receive this, given I'm going to your first post nearly 2 years ago... but you and I are kindred spirits. I look forward to reading through your journey, as mine is just beginning. I particularly liked your last paragraph. I have started to blog about my journey and hope to gain insights from you!! I cited this post in my blog today. I am desiring discipline.wordpress.com
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Colossians 3:18-25

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Slaves, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality. Colossians 3:18-25 ESV

1Peter 3:1-7

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 1Peter 3:1-7

Proverbs 31: 10-31

An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle. She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31: 10-31 (ESV)

Annie's Woodshed